Should I or Shouldn't I?

Is it living alone will always make a girl to think too much? Yea, I think so, at least it is truly happen to me. I always think should I try to appeal back to my hometown again? Should I ask another formal head letter from my panel doctor to try again? Would I wasted my efforts again or I should try again and again? One of the doctor tell me I should appeal before I get the posting not after I already being posted. Is it that is the reason why I failed in my first appeal?

I wish to go back my hometown to work. But when I think of working as a gov. servant, when being promoted, that will be a big chance to being transferred again. Is it I should get use to this type of life since I already chosen to be a gov. servant?

Many question marks appearing and appearing in my mind and none of them got an answer. This type of life will maintain how long? I don't know in others' eyes am I a strong lady or not but I know I am not. I am weak in my inner part and actually I don't like to be always alone. Working, outing or at home, all is myself. I don't mind to live alone but not all the time alone. Do not have anyone can share my feeling, do not have anyone to give a hand when I needed help.

I really hope I can get rid of this type of life very soon.